June 13, 2008<3 Amelia Dorn & Aaron Sao (;
Nov. 12, 2009 Saovardy Somtop
So I havent been posting much, so its time to do an update.
Lets see, there are NO boys whatsoever. I’m done with that. I’m done caring and giving out chances all the time. I’ve been slacking so badly in school and it’s hurting me. Mhmm, I’m working more now. I’m always tired ): can’t wait until summer, I’m not going to be lazy. I’m going to work, clean, and go to the gym. I can’t wait
Damn, I can’t believe you. Why are you doing this again? You promised, reassured me, told me constantly that it wasn’t going to happen again, but next thing I know not a single word from you for a month and a half. Do you have any idea of the effect that you have on me. The pain I feel to know that you really don’t care about me and my feelings. You never cared, my feelings are shit to you because obviously you never took the time to understand. Sorry for thinking you’d change. That you actually meant it this time. Things change and I know I’ll get over you. I’m done giving any chances and being sorry for what I’ve done when you’ve done much worse. Fuck you and your feelings, I don’t give two fucks anymore. Go screw yourself, go die, I fucken hate your guts.
I actually think about you, you know? I think about you & all the memories we have and the stuff we use to talk about. I think about how we had planned a future to be in each others lives. I think about the things you’d say that would make me smile and laugh. We were extremely close at one point, then all of a sudden you slowly faded away. How’d that happen? Why did it happen? Why’d you lead me on & left me hanging, completely heartbroken? I don’t have feelings like I use to, but that question still does run through my head. I care for you a lot even when you don’t know it. This week, I’ve tried so hard to avoid to not say hi, but every single time you come around or I walk pass you, you would just scream out my name until I say hi back and notice you. I miss you, I miss you in my life. I hate missing someone, so much. I just hope one day he’ll realize really how much I liked him, how much I cared for him, and just about how much he hurt me. I’m not mad about it, I’m just curious. Is that so bad?
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